“12:00 A.M.,” my iPhone lock screen informs me – it’s a school night. I’m still awake even though all of my homework is finished, ready and waiting by the door for another grueling 9 periods the following morning. My mother and I lean in simultaneously around the suddenly meager 6.7 square inches of screen. It’s post-prom, and the pictures are FINALLY up.

Are we excessive, obsessive, and perhaps even stalker-ish? The answer may be all of the above. School dances are often perceived as “lame,” but there is something about prom that has withstood the test of time. However, the standard procedure of prom (dress, date, tickets, ride, rinse and repeat) is often taken for granted. In fact, this formula does not work for everyone. Since some schools across the nation have banned same-sex couples from attending prom and thus deprived them of this quintessential high school experience, not all students even get to attend the dance.

One of the first stories of school policies discriminating against gay students that garnered the attention of the mainstream media is the 2010 case of Constance McMillen. According to The Huffington Post and CBS News, the high-school senior approached the school board of her rural Mississippi school district in the hopes of repealing the bans on same-sex prom couples. McMillen wanted to bring another girl to prom. After being shot down, she turned to the American Civil Liberties Union, which issued a demand letter asking for an all-inclusive prom.

However, in response to this, the Itawamba Agricultural High School decided that no prom would be better than a prom with gay students, so they cancelled the dance all together in the interest of the “education, safety and well-being of students,” as stated in an official report issued by the school. The senior found herself faced with animosity from her peers who had also lost their school dance. McMillen and the ACLU decided to ultimately sue her high school, and even though the court ruled that gay students couldn’t be barred from high school events, the prom was never reinstated.

In another case, Sullivan High School, located in a small Indiana town, revisited their prom policy so that all students, regardless of sexual orientation, could attend the dance.  An online article published by nydailynews.com reports that in response, some high-schoolers some high schoolers took it upon themselves to host a separate “traditional” prom on the grounds that no “good prom” could allow gay students since homosexuality “isn’t right nor should it be accepted.”

Despite the lack of understanding and acceptance for all students in these policies and in the mindsets of those who continue to exclude gay couples, there has been a lot of progress in recent years. For example, the self-proclaimed vigilantes of Sullivan, Indiana were met with widespread criticism by allies of the LGBTQ community. In fact, other students and the administration at the Sullivan High School condemned the exclusively straight event. Many took to social media via Facebook and Change.org to not only call for an inclusive prom, but also the resignations of faculty who supported the “traditional” prom.

Timothy Chen ’17 remarks that “schools should be teaching and demonstrating acceptance, not exclusion. It is absurd and unethical to exclude a student from a public school event.” These tales of tenacity and triumph beg the question: what is the Ridge High School policy on allowing same-sex couples at prom, and almost more importantly, what should it be?

According to Principal Howlett, “[Ridge High School] has no written policy but same-sex couples are as welcome as any other couples. I do not believe that a public school should ban same-sex couples.  I do not believe that discrimination is fair.”

Perhaps giving gay students the same opportunities lies not in explicitly acknowledging that same-sex student couples can be admitted to prom, but rather in treating them in the same manner as other prom couples. Same-sex couples at prom shouldn’t need to be treated as a “special” case or evaluated in a fashion that differs from how any other students going to prom are. It should go without saying that everyone can go to prom. In fact, the very core of the gay rights movement lies in the concept that all people are people and should be treated equally. Everyone should be able to choose who they want to bring to prom. This is something indubitable, and it shouldn’t have to be written out in school rules.

The Ridge Prom policy’s attitude towards gay students at Ridge, or rather its lack thereof, sends a much larger message than a rule that commands students to accept each other regardless of their differences would. It reflects an existing and ever-improving mindset of the student body here that doesn’t question a peer’s right to enjoy high school like all others. It challenges the notion that schools need to clearly outline how gay students should be “dealt with.” Why should there be a school policy that says same-sex couples can go to prom? Why should it matter? Isn’t it unquestionable that everyone gets to go to prom?

As Principal Howlett puts it, “I think RHS has always been accepting of our gay community.  I have seen progress in my time here.  Give it time – people usually don’t change overnight.  I am optimistic that things will continue to improve.  I would hope that the supporters of our gay community would continue their support.”

Even though there is still progress to be made at Ridge in terms of treating all students with an open heart and an open mind, our prom “policy”, to me, is truly the most inclusive.